Abintus Coaching Resources

Building on the resource on ‘Using Silence in Coaching’ there are further areas around silence that can be looked at and considered in your coaching practice.

Considerations around Silence

Silence can occur at different points in coaching, not just when the coach creates opportunity for it…

  • What if your coachee is silent at different points in the coaching, what could that mean? What if there is silence at start of session or relationship, what could this be a signal of?
  • Is silence a signal of something more fundamental about their thoughts on coaching?
  • What could persistent silence be indicative of?
  • Is the coachee more of a reflector by nature, what does this mean when considering silence?
  • What does silence say about your relationship?
  • Are they more silent when you ask certain questions about certain things – people, situations, relationships, thoughts and feelings?
  • If you are wanting to ‘dive in’ and not allow them the silence examine what might be causing this. Is this about you or them? What is it about silence you find uncomfortable?

Tips when using silence

  • Consider in your contracting conversation a discussion about silence and that it will be a tool you will use.
  • Use it sparingly; overuse will have a negative impact on coachee’s engagement with the process, and it will lose its potency.
  • Note for yourself what is a period of silence and what is just short silence after you have asked a question.
  • Silence can work especially well when you have asked the coachee to consider their thoughts or feelings.
  • Observe your coachee when using silence, what do you see, not see, what emotions are coming out, what is their body language telling you. Are any of these worth sharing back as feedback?

Knowing how to use and ‘play with silence’ means it can be a very useful tool for both coach and client. It also allows you to gain a deeper understanding of the client and your coaching relationship.

If you have found this resource useful, contact Abintus to see how we can further support you or your organisation in its coaching and leadership activities.